Absurd things thrift store customers say

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On the phone

  • Where would I find one of those?
    • I'd recommend looking on Craig's list
  • Right! Right. I hadn't thought of that.


  • What's their number?
  • I need a cable to plug my phone into the Google.

In person

  • What's this [pointing at gizmo, priced $5]?
    • I don't know.
  • Do I need it?
    • (pause) I don't know what that is. I don't know what is does.
  • Can you find out for me?
    • Well why do think you need it? Your life has probably been going fine without it.
  • I don't know. It just looks so nice.
    • Well, why don't you google the model number?
  • Thats an idea. How do I do that?
    • Type the model number into the search field for google.
  • Which number is the model number?
  • Probably the largest number on the back of the device
    • Can you read it for me? I can't see it.
  • <after a sigh> Sure, its [the model number]
    • Can you write that down for me
  • <grumpily> sure, I'd love to do that!
  • Can you show me how to do the google?

[I walked out of the room at this point]